Competition can be good...

This one is another knowledge drop.  For those not already familiar with what happens here;

I get cornered into a conversation with one of my ‘elders’.  Innocently going along, until wham I get caught like a rabbit in the headlights full speed into said knowledge drop.

Invariably, I punch back with my version of knowledge – only to then be put in my place before even more knowledge is dropped.  The funniest versions are when I don’t even know the extent of my schooling until later – in this case years later when I am writing a blog entry!

This entry finds me getting a life lesson on the types of competition.

The conversation…

Dad: “How’s it going?”

TaT: “Not bad, there are a few exams left and I think I am going to come out top.  Although, there is one guy who might just pip me to the top post.”

Dad: “Is he better than you?”

TaT: “Nah, just that there is only one threat that I can see to getting the podium.”  Shifting uneasily at assessing whether someone was better than me.

Dad: “Hmmmm….”

That is all he needed to say, hmmmmm…and I bit…

TaT: “Well no, he ain’t better than me.  I can beat him, it’s just annoying that he is there…”

Dad: “You think it’s bad that you have to compete with him?”

TaT: “Yeah I would not have to try as hard if he weren’t there.”

Dad: “So you would be top, but would you then try to get as high a mark?”

TaT: “Don’t need to then do I?”

Dad: “But what about the next stage?”

TaT: “What next stage?”

Dad: “Well, say at Uni or wherever you are going to next with all these exams?”  Clearly he paid close attention to my career aspirations!

TaT: “Okay, yes at Uni.”

Dad: “Well, surely the better you do now the easier it will be to perform at the next stage no?”

TaT: “I guess, but…”

Cutting over me.

Dad: “So is the competition a good thing or bad thing?”

TaT: “I guess it’s good.”

Dad: “You know, depending on how it is done, competition can be good and bad.”

TaT: “How so?”

This is where the hands come out.  Imagination will be required.

Queue the Jazz hands…

With both hands stretched out palm down, he looked up at me.

Dad: “Say two people were at the same level.  That’s what these two hands represent.”

TaT: “Well, yeah I got that…thanks!”  Honesty; I had no idea that’s what he was going for.  In fact, I thought I was about to get an impromptu Tai Chi lesson!

Dad: “Say over time, with effort and luck and such and such, the guy on the left got stronger and better at what he does.”  He raised his left had 2 inches higher.

I nodded.

Dad: “Now, the guy on the right is thinking, ‘Hold on, he is better than me, I need to do something about this’.  What does he do?”

TaT: “Well obviously, the guy on the right works on getting better too.  If I was him I would aim for higher than the guy on the left.”  I then took his right hand and moved it 2 inches above the left.  Feeling quite smug; I had furthered the conversation within his terms.

Dad: “Good, you get it.”  Sounding almost surprised I was keeping up!

Dad: “But, that’s not how the world always works.”

– he reverted his left hand above the right –

“There is another type of person that sees the other doing better and then tries to work out how to bring them down a peg or two.”

- he then brought the left hand two inches lower than the right -

TaT: “Yup, been on the receiving end and got the t-shirt.”

Dad: “The trouble with this version is that the left person sees the right knocking him down,”

– right hand now 2 inches above the left –

“he then feels like he has to get even and knocks the legs out from the right guy to then bring him down,”

– right hand now 2 inches below the left –

“and so this continues”

– hands now moving step by step down –

“in a downward spiral.  Neither side winning and both bringing each other further down.”

TaT: “Yeah, people see someone doing well and can’t take it.”

Dad: “Yup, everyone looses in this case.  The guy on the left and the guy on the right.  But people as a whole also lose out.”

TaT: “Huh? People as a whole?”

Dad: “Yeah, think about it – all that energy wasted, destroying the other could well have been spent helping someone instead.  That focus, and momentum used to bring down could easily have been more productively used.  And so, in this case it is a race to the bottom and we all – society – lose out as a result.”

Struck by that last part, silently staring at his hands, I started thinking back to when I had experienced this very scenario.  I did not get long to contemplate though….

Dad: “But, competition can be good.”

TaT: “How on earth is that good?  Like you said, it’s a race to the bottom and no one wins!  What have I missed?!”

Dad: “Remember what you said earlier?  Where one sees someone doing well and then seeks to improve themselves to a point better than the first?”

Frick!  He was going to use my own suggestion to prove his point!

Dad: “Remember the left above the right, the right then improves himself to a point above the left”

 – right hand moving 2 inches above left –

“the left sees this and works on improving himself”

– left hand moving 2 inches above the right –

“and so on and so on.”

– both hands continuously moving one ahead of the other upwards –

“In this way they both compel one another to outdo the other and compete to better themselves and others around them.  In this way we all win.  Society as a whole will be better off as a result of this type of competition.”

TaT: “…”  Wow! He was right!  But heck if I was going to show him!

Dad: “Anyway, I just came to see how you were doing and also Mum wanted you to sort your room out…”

Take Aways…

1) Not all competition is destructive.

2) Understand what type of competition you wish to pursue yourself.  Upward spiral or downward.